Day 28- Raising the White Flag

Before I get started, let me just say that I have been in a bit of a funk. Since I skipped my Lentspiration on Day 18, I haven't been able to get back to a truly relaxed place. There is nothing concrete I can put my finger on, just that the hopeful disposition I was gaining from Lent has disappeared.

Yesterday I found myself upset because the travel agent shorted us one night on mine and my husband's anniversary trip. This is something she had fixed by this morning for a trip that wont' take place until May, but I was all torn up on my way home yesterday. I waisted time worrying about nothing! The bad thing is that I knew it at the time and continued to let it eat at me.

Then when I got home, I found out that my little boy had stolen a mini lego man from a poster hung on his school walls- someone's project. AND we also had a note from his teacher suggesting that we take him to the doctor ("perhaps he should see his physician") because he asks to go to the bathroom 2-3 times in a 45-60 minute period during nap time. The kid never takes naps. Ever. And he has been using this strategy forever. He asks to go to the bathroom so he can get out of laying on the floor. Case closed. This still has me fuming this morning because I feel like we have two months left in the school year and these teachers should know my child by now.

Anger. Frustration. Anxiety. Lentspiration is not currently winning the battle. I feel exasperated.

I just opened up TLL and read today's chapter and by God, it made me laugh. Just what I needed. Today's lesson is about Randy's real name being Randolph and his lifelong battle with his mother over using his nickname. In college she would address his letters to "Randolf Pausch," and he would write "return to sender on it." That gave me a huge chuckle. He must have been really convicted about this. So funny. I cannot imagine sending my mother's letters back for something so trivial. I love it.

As I type, I think about these last two internal "battles" I have been having, neither that big, but both a cerebral war for me. (Stupid, GAD!) It is time for me to raise my own white flag and give it up. Is one missed night (easy fix!) and a suggestion to take my son to the doctor- oops! I mean physician- really what I want to get bent out of shape about? It isn't.

Breath. Let go. Help me Lord to find peace.

Sia- Breathe me

--Dear God, I have a hard time raising the white flag with battles within myself. Please help me to stop things from escalating and to find peace. Please help me to slow down my mind and remind myself that even though some things in my life may be wrong right now, there are more things that are right. Amen.